I want to thank all of you who in the last weeks sent me all those sweet and encouraging cards and emails, lots of well wishes and prayers in many languages to several Gods. You are all soooooooo wonderful!
I guess your love for me was very helpful because it allowed me to go through "Phase 1" of my stem cell treatment with only one significant set back, now fortunately resolved. I wasn't a lot of fun having almost half a gallon of fluid in my chest but once I was drained I bounced back and now I'm home.
My level of energy is fluctuating, though, so please don't get offended if I'm slow or unable to talk on the phone, email or write. You are still in my heart.
Steve watches over me like an angel and with his supervision and care nothing bad can happen to me. He already saved my life by taking me to the ER last Thursday. He is the "ultimate" caregiver.
While bound in bed by all those machines, in the hospital, I had the chance to think about my life and how I want it to be. I want it to be simpler and more streamlined and I don't want to be always so hard on myself. Even in my dreams, which I consider a reflection of how I perceive reality, I'm not such a "bitchy boss" to myself anymore.
As my hair was shedding I also decided to shed so much unnecessary clutter in my daily life. I want to be just like my office at Purpose: clean, simple and inviting. I already started to make small and big changes in my life, and by going in that direction I feel pretty good about myself already.
So now I look forward to "Phase 2" of the treatment, which is going to be a 2-3 week, inpatient, intense chemo and the stem cell transplant. My brief stint to the ICU delayed everything by one week but I'm still overall on schedule. While I'm in the hospital, I'll be in isolation which should give me more time to reorganize my life, inside and out. I'll have a new bone marrow and a new life.Again, I'm speechless by the outpouring of love and support from all of you, even those who are going through much larger personal tragedies than my disease. I can only reply to love with love.
Even though I spent four days in intensive care, and lost my hair in the process, I bounced back as you can see from the attached photo. (I've sent the photo in two formats jpeg and tiff. I hope you can see it).
And, I'm proud to say I made my own hat, in one day, from yarn given to me by my best friend Hena just before she went back to Bangladesh. THANK YOU HENA!!!
So, love to all of you, Licia